(714): Then she screamed 'SHOCKER ME, SHOCKER ME!.'I just never expected it to actually happen...

Great Night (7) Bad Night (4) Comment (0) More texts from (714)

(714): I had to either fart or poop so bad, but who would turn down a blowjob?

Great Night (23) Bad Night (61) Comment (1) More texts from (714)

(714): (Snt) Chasing vodka with wine works right? (Rcvd) Ummmm... wine is MORE alcohol. I don't think that helps. And aren't you supposed to be attending a wedding TODAY?? (Sent) Wooo!!! whiskey does it better

Great Night (11) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (714)

(714): girlfriend spent the night. had sex. then woke up. went to work. came home. had morning sex. and now were playing call of duty black ops.. she loves it. best weekend ever..

Great Night (157) Bad Night (13) Comment (7) More texts from (714)

(714): You made me look like I was dating a horse.

Great Night (2) Bad Night (3) Comment (0) More texts from (714)

(714): This is the biggest kickback i've ever seen!

Great Night (3) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (714)

(714): you kept handing out beer to the tricker-treaters

Great Night (176) Bad Night (10) Comment (0) More texts from (714)

(714): no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you

Great Night (92) Bad Night (11) Comment (3) More texts from (714)

(714): So I went to bed with 3 girls and woke up with 2 guys...help?

Great Night (6) Bad Night (18) Comment (2) More texts from (714)

(714): After hitting my bong, the nike commercial comes on and my friend says "glad that wasn't for a suicide commercial". She didn't even blink then went from saying that she said "So anyways, I really like watching the news lately". I then realized I'm not calling her if I'm depressed haha.

Great Night (1) Bad Night (2) Comment (0) More texts from (714)

(714): (rec) we taped ur hands and feet with duct tape. and then wen u had to pee u screamed "hullkkkk!" and ripped the tape and ur shirt.

Great Night (18) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (714)

(714): I want to get all of the people from my drunk texts to rent out a warehouse somewhere and have a huge rager. i feel like i know these people. (rec) girl, i too have that dream. let's do it.

Great Night (165) Bad Night (2) Comment (26) More texts from (714)

(714): (rec) than we got pulled over because you yacked outside car next to the cop car. (sent) and what did drunk me do? (rec) you yelled at the cop " i got me driber sover and i drunk before this ride so let me go copper because i need to get me some homemade poon." (sent) shit! (rec) the cop said well played, get home safe. (sent) *(&(*$#$(#*@& FUCK YA!

Great Night (22) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (714)

(714): He told me to watch his dick grow like a chia pet

Great Night (19) Bad Night (1) Comment (0) More texts from (714)

Remember The Pics From Last Night?

Best Friends :)
Awesomeness!