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(678):
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
(845):
so i was looking at our pics from last night, & i gotta tell ya, you looked like a blow-up doll
(703):
I drank gin and juice last night. I felt like I had to class itup, so I put lemon slices in it.
(518):
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
(kate):
I blacked out.. Hit a parked car. And slept on the floor. Lol
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(347):
28498F27 I'm a sexy guy girls only add me kinda new on this bbm thin
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(347)
(347):
"Ew I just got a hard penis text from my old coke dealer. Its not even 4pm? WTF! Gross."
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(347)
(347):
You asked everyone there if they would cuddle with you and when everyone said no, you got angry, yelled, FINE ! I'll cuddle myself !, hugged yourself then passed out on the couch. It was the single most adorable drunken moment ever
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(347)
(347):
From a very drunk fried: Yo ima sleep over the highwy just wanna get near yhis guyyy, gonna sleep over ur crib just in case kk? Lol Sent: What ?
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(347)
(347):
Omg mitchell has empty soo coo bottles around his room ! You guys will marry someday , its destiny !.
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(347)
(347):
Sent: I need your logic and reasoning right now. Give me a reason not to spit in this bitches face Received: There aren't any. Do it, bitch.
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(347)
(347):
Baby oil was involved in my night. Baby oil that he keeps in a water bottle in his ceiling...?
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(347)
(347):
speaking of winter its 15 degrees here and i dident get my new coat yet, so I put on my spider coat and found 9 bucks in the pocket, a crack lighter, and a baggy with coke in the corners, its like a time capsule of my life 3 years ago
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(347)
(347):
And thats the reason why shes the one getting married and were the ones driving around for penis
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(347)
(347):
its like he has spidey senses for when im horny only theyre called vagina senses
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(347)
(347):
after 7 orgasms and cumming 6 times i am laying in bed and he went to the store to get me a drink, I think i died and went to heaven
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(347)
(347):
i can imagine u dinny i fuoin that y?
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(347)
(347):
you asked me to re-teach you your a.b.c.'s granted I am an early education major, i was not teaching them to you because it was funny to watch you try to remember them
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(347)
(347):
u rely on everyone carrying u around this is why no one calls u to hang out
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