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(417):
You asshole that wasn't anal ease, that was Icy hot and were both pissed!
(360):
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
(902):
I just lost an hour of my life creeping you on facebook..
(410):
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
(208):
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
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(704):
sent: i just got a bike stuck in a tree. received: how? sent: climbing trees with a bike
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