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(fluff):
Last night recv'd: "There's a bald guy on the bus in front of me and the fold in his head is smiling at me! Jealous?"Lol, it makes me smile every time i read it coz that is a typical random txt from the friend who sent it to me :) . MDT
(720):
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
(904):
That prick just told my fiance that he fucked me up the ass (1-904): This is your fiance, no he didn't. why the fuck don't I get to do anal? (904): your dick is three times the size! (1-904) you're forgiven
(847):
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
(508):
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag (508): I need new friends
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(215):
I asked him what he meant by " so are we dating " ... if he says the word " girlfriend ".... im calling the police!
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