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(309):
Im definitely gona have to be on top so she cant see my killer tan lines
(952):
She said she wanted to be on that show 16 and pregnant. Who am I to stand in the way of a dream?
(604):
some girls fb status just said 'fuck farmville to the fullest'. i defriended her.
(763):
When I meet a girl for the first time I shake hands with my left. I don't want to intimidate her with the competition right away.
(717):
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way (1-717): you don't.
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(816):
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
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