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(850):
I went to the doctor because my arm hurt. When he told me I had tennis elbow I said "that's funny I don't play tennis". Then he asked me if I had a girlfriend. When I said no he said "Well I guess we solved this one."
(586):
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
(+44):
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
(617):
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
(703):
Dude middle eastern men are great in bed.It was like I was the persian wall and he was Alexander the great. HE CONQUERED THAT SHIT!
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(440):
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
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