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(631):
i went into my stepmoms drawer to look for a pair of socks when i came across her purple vibrator. it started to vibrate and when i went to turn it off i broke off a piece and it wouldnt stop vibrating.. i ran.. and my parents came home to the vibrator going off uncontrolably in the drawer .. awesome
(603):
Lets just say if I was prego right now I wouldn't know who the baby daddy is!
(630):
when she was going down on me her tongue piercing fell out and stabbed me
(502):
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
(901):
i want you inside me tonight! ;)) (1-901) wrong number mom....
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(260):
A+ night. just had the best sex ever and now she's sitting on top of me feeding me ice cream :)
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