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(513):
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
(502):
I told my girl she could have an adderall if she could make me cum from a bj. Hahaha, I've never seen such inspired work
(508):
I just realized something. Otters must have ridiculous abs. i mean they can break clams on their tummies. i wish i had otter abs. (1-508) Holy shit me too
(516):
He called me drunk at 1 in the morning & spoke to me in 3 different accents & 4 languages, fluently.
(801):
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
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(915):
So he asked why I wasn't having another drink and I told him that I was the DD, and he looked at my boobs and said "yes, yes you are"
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