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(813):
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
(231):
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
(513):
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
(757):
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
(208):
please come get me! I'm on a boat, I'm fucked up, and I'm afraid of the ducks. They're gonna eat my head . PLEASE come get me!!
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(blake):
you are my heart fruit. i am a tree that blossoms heart shpaed fruit and you are all former blowwoms of m y heart fruit tree
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Sam
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2 years ago
...Uhh....may I ask what the fuck?
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Sam (1 Points) 2 years ago
...Uhh....may I ask what the fuck?