MDTxts
Pics Last Night
F You, Auto Correct!
Fun Facts
Facebooking Fail
JMML
Hipsters
Fixed It
Fail Family
OMG
BFF
(303):
oh no sweetie, he went down on me first. didnt even ask for a bj in return, and then proceeded to give me four orgasms. and did i mention that this was the first time we had sex? seriously, im like 99% sure he's a keeper.
(334):
women r so stupid. i hate those bastards. but i luv fuckin em... women should just be sex toys. they shouldnt be allowed to talk
(720):
(720) so he ended up getting real close and then when he was about to kiss me he said "I wanna cuddle" and burrowed himself into my neck. Then he said "SIKE" and started making out with me. (303) 10 bucks says it was the rookies first time up to bat
(403):
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
(516):
So this girl I'm babysitting just said "I need a cookie to stay awake" and I thought wow that's all it takes for kids...when did we go from cookies to coke?
Home
Vote Up New Texts
Best Nights
Worst Nights
Colleges
Randomize
Pics
Submit
(813):
pahaha epic. your "i just saw your dick" face is the same as my disappointed face
Great Night
(
4
)
Bad Night
(
12
)
Comment
(0)
More texts from
(813)
(352):
Wanna go bowling? (407) Is that like on wii?
Great Night
(
19
)
Bad Night
(
1
)
Comment
(1)
More texts from
(352)
(407):
(sent) Where are my clothes and why am I wearing a teke jersey and some guys bathing suit (rec) I don't even know where to begin with last night! Not a very classy night. You totally had sex with ___ and stole his clothes. He took a picture of you and sent it to ur boyfriend. You guys broke up and said u were dating ___ but later he said u weren't. I have no idea if u guys are dating or not. You should never drink tequila ever again cuz it makes you a total slut lol.
Great Night
(
22
)
Bad Night
(
7
)
Comment
(1)
More texts from
(407)
(407):
bought 6 somberos for cinco de mayo tomorrow already planning on loosing 5 of them drunkly...... thats being prepared
Great Night
(
16
)
Bad Night
(
0
)
Comment
(0)
More texts from
(407)
(407):
You spun around in circles looking for your car, stopped spinning, assumed that you teleported to my house and starting spinning again, attempting to teleport home.
Great Night
(
29
)
Bad Night
(
0
)
Comment
(0)
More texts from
(407)
(407):
I'm in jail. I just got a DUI.
Great Night
(
4
)
Bad Night
(
46
)
Comment
(1)
More texts from
(407)
(407):
There are zombies everywhere covered in chocolate syrup eating fried chicken.
Great Night
(
21
)
Bad Night
(
4
)
Comment
(1)
More texts from
(407)
(407):
(snt) Why wont this window shade open? (rec) thats a door
Great Night
(
23
)
Bad Night
(
0
)
Comment
(0)
More texts from
(407)
(407):
Whats wrong with your time machine?
Great Night
(
19
)
Bad Night
(
3
)
Comment
(0)
More texts from
(407)
(407):
im gonna go get my phone charger out of the fridge
Great Night
(
16
)
Bad Night
(
4
)
Comment
(0)
More texts from
(407)
(407):
Knowing the alphabet backwards almost as good as I know it forwards has once again got me off the hook from friends giving me a sobriety test for me to drive home drunk.
Great Night
(
27
)
Bad Night
(
2
)
Comment
(1)
More texts from
(407)
(407):
Shove your clit down me
Great Night
(
6
)
Bad Night
(
10
)
Comment
(0)
More texts from
(407)
(407):
I got pulled over on my bike! WTF?
Great Night
(
29
)
Bad Night
(
8
)
Comment
(0)
More texts from
(407)
(561):
(sent): So his dad walks in while he was giving me a tit job.He starts yelling and screaming and going on about me getting pregnant. (rcvd): so i guess your not coming over for awhile? (sent): sorry:\
Great Night
(
7
)
Bad Night
(
24
)
Comment
(1)
More texts from
(561)
1
2
Next Page
Remember The Pics From Last Night?
Pic from (843)
Pic from (702)
Pic from (207)
Pic from (509)
Pic from (859)
Pic from (421)
Pic from (254)
Pic from (918)
Pic from (877)
Pic from (972)
Pic from (609)
Pic from (386)
Pic from (713)
Pic from (614)
Pic from (615)
Pic from (317)
Best Friends :)
Funny Videos
Make a Dare
Your Mind Blown - FACTS
Awesomeness!