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(618):
My sister just asked me for a mint too, as I'm taking my birth control :-x
(419):
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
(732):
I assume you've already forgotten but tonight was magical. Keep staying sexy. Mike was my name. Spread the word. Mike I tell ya. (1-732): Mike you sucked. Sucked I tell ya and yea I will spread the word.
(919):
I was sitting on the girl's porch smoking a blunt, her mom walked out and told me to pass it or get the fuck out
(978):
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
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(616):
fuck... im so overwhelmed right now... this is like wen fucking marlin finds nemo!!!! AHHHHHH yes... this is epic shit.
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(616)
(209):
I swear the only thing i remember was her boobs.. Its like they were WATERMELONS! I just wanted to bury myself in them and hide in there!
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(209)
(970):
....and I'm kinda schammered at her house and her husband is sexy so sorry if I taint the family name tonight mom :/
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(970)
(970):
Played kings cup last night, 4s are for whores, so I managed to slip the 4 back in the pile numerous times...needless to say the chicks got drunk, and we got laid
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(970)
(720):
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
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(720)
(970):
No worries ya got the paper done test raped me and now im drunk and trying to learn how to ride a bicycle
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(970)
(970):
(970): Why did you hang up on me last night? (1-970): You said that charizard and blastoise had been fighting for two hours, and that you were going to take me "live to the interview"
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(970)
(303):
FUCK YOU SEXUAL HORMONES!!!!!
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(616):
NO!! he was being obnoxious and asked me if i wanted to suck his cock tonight... i sad im sorry i cant, im religious. i cant eat meat on friday.. really he was just nasty. (283): AHAHAHA im using that one
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(616)
(970):
Dude... I have no idea how to go about pooping
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(970)
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Remember The Pics From Last Night?
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