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(651):
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
(240):
Hahahaha. Well the highlight of my night is us driving home, me having to stop to let ash puke and you asking me "should I puke too, to make her feel better?"
(401):
He shoulda kept his face outta my vagina if he didn't wanna date me. - MDT
(+86):
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
(920):
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
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(ryan):
Last night I received, "im drivin and drinkin and textin lol" i replied "dude thats not smart" a while later he said "i know i just hit a car" MDT
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