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(630):
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
(269):
The last words I said to her were "You will find your bra over there".
(419):
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
(336):
how the f*ck do you spell takeela?
(908):
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
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(203):
haha i want to puke right now...but the toilet doesn't work so I can't haha (703) - lmfao that's fb worthy
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