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(812):
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
(626):
Getting drunk together would have been more fun if you didn't try to kiss me. I'm not gay Sarah. (1-666): Not yet. Wait until I show you what my tongue can do.
(614):
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you' (740): i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
(919):
we were at the drive thru and u said I can has a cheezburger? into the little box, there was a slight pause before the person on the other end said Nom nom nom nom
(208):
so my boyfriend take me 3oo miles away for a romantic night. on the way he stops at an adult store, bought me a vibrator, then we headed to the hotel where he proceeded to make sure i "got off" before we had sex.. then after great sex and a night of cuddling, he takes me to disney the next day... winn??
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(773):
the song young forever was written in dedication to my liver.
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