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(44):
I can spend today knowing that my semen is swimming around inside her in church at Sunday School, teaching kids about Christ
(252):
you named my tits and offered to buy them drinks (1-252): well at least I was a gentleman!
(210):
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
(515):
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
(631):
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
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(678):
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
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