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(780):
totally got smashed last night alone and woke up with a wet vag and and an open condom beside my bed....no fucking clue who came over...and the my phones screen is smashed so i cant even check my calls or txts! maybe an ex....hopefully not the booze delivery guy?!?!!!
(803):
Got a fraud alert from my bank this morning because my tab so high last night
(850):
her mom just walked in on us fucking. All she said was "yall better be using a condom. im not ready to be a grandma yet."
(734):
Received last night: "I just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "f*ck trophies." MDT
(732):
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
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(423):
"bring me another beer when you come back damn it, i'm gonna be on my drunk text tonight even if i end up dead, you wait and see."
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