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(803):
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
(919):
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
(607):
he and I came at the same time. It's supposed to be really romantic but It wasn't. He yelled "JINX!" at the top of his lungs.....
(810):
my purple phone smells like purple.
(434):
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
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(773):
dude i dreamt i was singing a duet with steve martin "my little buttercup" dressed as a mariachi
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