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(416):
Come find me, I think im dying. Sandwiches, EVERYWHERE.
(765):
I went to the store to get Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. The salesgirl there didn’t know what it was, so I tried to explain. “It’s about a black guy who crashes his car, sleeps with prostitutes, and attacks people with a golf club.” The salesgirl came back with Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2010.
(314):
how badass would it be if USA came out in Mighty Duck's jerseys?
(516):
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
(978):
i used baking grease as lip gloss
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(702):
I just took every freeway and drove across the entire city while smoking a blunt and listening to Lil Wayne to go to the sonic down the street hahaha!
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