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(512):
you had to do it.... you HAD to pull down santas pants... i'm never taking you to the mall again.
(856):
(sent) I am going to tear your clothes off, lick your pussy until you are dripping, and then tongue fuck you. Then the real fucking will begin! (rcvd) you gave me shivers down my spine!
(802):
I tipped the pizza dude 2 hits of my joint per mile...... seems fair, right?
(989):
i just apologized to my frosted flakes for flushing them down the toilet
(845):
haha soo after everytime we fuck he takes me to get a slushie. its like he is thanking me with a slushie for fucking him.
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(978):
Note to self. Shaving while drunk = bad idea.
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