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(714):
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
(973):
I vaguely remember that henna tattooist. Great idea having him there. Pirate Hooker across my chest....I crack my shit up. I must be having an allergic reaction to the henna...its all red and swolen and stings like a bitch.(1-973)dude that wasnt henna!!
(Sha-Sha):
Last night, I received "I apparently suck at being good looking. But i'm good at shutting down uglies." MDT
(908):
I know it's lunch time and all, but have you seen my dildo?
(202):
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
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(312):
I woke her up by texting her meow 20 times. Then I told her to "licky my dicky to get some milk." She said "meow :)"
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