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(480):
Dude, dude, it's cool. I fixed your cereal
(630):
(sent) why is my dick on fire and red(rec) you thought my pepper spray was a spray on condom
(541):
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
(410):
the blue m&ms are the cutest but the green ones make ur boobs bigger so i only eat those colors want the rest?
(913):
seriously he is the sweetest guy ever he sold his play station to buy me the plan b pill!
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(601):
I imagine Heaven being like that feeling of relief while ur pissing.. But FOREVER
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