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(360):
hey, next time you sneak out of the house to fuck your boyfriend in his car, dont call me in the middle of it and leave a twelve minute message... dont let dad know or your ass is grass. (360) k mom. have a good day at work, love you...
(214):
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
(909):
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
(571):
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
(403):
Sorry...my phone auto-corrected "I want to take you out to a nice dinner" to "I just wanna get drunk and titty fuck you"
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(414):
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
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