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(732):
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
(917):
I think you freaked out the cab driver. You were having one of your episodes where you started crying because we remembered to bring you back home.
(303):
Cock blocked twice today. Note to self, bring paper towel for drive home.
(630):
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
(440):
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
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(773):
" No, No you cant build it BOB!! You cocky son of a bitch.
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