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(425):
this is like your coming out as a hot chick who isnt dating a douchebag anymore party
(713):
I have no clue what happened last night, but I woke up in my bathtub naked covered in chocolate pudding with a lawn gnome and texts from you (1-713) I woke up naked in my backyard on a pool float with pictures of us together on your phone. wanna get your phone and my phone together and try and figure out what the hell happened?
(801):
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
(717):
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
(516):
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
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(609):
EVERHYWHERE U LOOK EVERYWHER THERES A HEART TGERES A HEART I HEAR YOUR HOLDING ONTO. I FUCKING MISS BOB SAGET MAN.
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