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(314):
shes paying me in beer and blowjobs, so i cant complain too much
(336):
Last night i received this text "While banging her I felt something funny inside, and fished out a condom. Jen is on the pill and we never used one... ever!"
(2340):
she was 2 peices of bread short of a tuna sandwich
(402):
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
(407):
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
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(941):
My ass says happy birthday...is tht slutty?
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