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(Anonymous):
Last night, "mmmmmm... I luv sum chocolate thunder from down under just maybe a little more than i luv gay midget porn!" MDTxt
(413):
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
(516):
You pissed in a condom and were planning on throwing it at joe when he walked through the door but your girl got there first you clearly saw it was her and threw it anyway. douche!
(905):
I have lube and nutella in my nighttable drawer, wanna come over for sex and sandwiches?
(850):
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
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(757):
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
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