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(919):
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
(813):
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
(610):
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
(804):
snowed in at my parent's house. my father and i have been going shot for shot for the past five hours.
(631):
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
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(310):
I just found the missing piece of quesdilla from last night
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