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(541):
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
(443):
I pulled him into the closet, played with his balls and when he got hard I walked out and said "now you're hard AND lonely bitch"
(484):
Today at work i went outside to clean the menu board thinking the fresh air would sober me up (610) you went to work drunk? (484) yeah, and i did a cartwheel for entertainment. directly after i blurted out "my legs haven't been that far apart in a while" right infront of my boss. drinks tonight?
(215):
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
(618):
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
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(440):
(440) I smoked weed (412) Don't they drug test first grade teachers? (440) They haven't tested me yet, I'm taking my chances.
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2 years ago
School makes so much sense now...
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683 (0 Points) 2 years ago
School makes so much sense now...