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(781):
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
(847):
I was Hungover laying on the floor when my son came in and asked if I was okay. When I told him I wasn’t feeling well, he pulled out his Nerf gun and shot me to put me out of my misery.
(503):
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
(919):
I was sucking his dick last night and little pieces of things were falling off into my mouth. Is it possible to have dandruff in your pubes?
(773):
woke up at 7 with no pants on and a football jersey shirt drawn on with sharpie and a bow tie to tie it off. i got job interview at 8 and i cant get this shit off.
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(325):
I was at a party last night, i tried to make this girl jealous by texting myself "Let's fuck!" and showing it around. I accidentally sent it to her. She said yes. WIN! MDT
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1 year ago
Bolk9j Comrade kill yourself.
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Buy cheap software online (0 Points) 1 year ago
Bolk9j Comrade kill yourself.