(970): I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.

Great Night (1330) Bad Night (45) Comment (25) More texts from (970)

(226): so ya that raccoon that keeps trying to get in my window.. i just blew pot smoke in his face and i guess it was to much cuz he froze then fell over and rolled off the roof. lmao... he's all good tho, just seen him staggering away.

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(316): omg bring my wallet when you come get me tonight. i'm buying a fucking giraffe.

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(706): last nite u broke up with me and told me ill never find another girl like u... i woke up this morning with 3 girls and im pretty sure there all better than u ever were :)

Great Night (1268) Bad Night (60) Comment (44) More texts from (706)

(503): OMG! i just made a guy walk into a pole when i bent over to pick up my phone! best confidence boost ever!!

Great Night (1238) Bad Night (15) Comment (4) More texts from (503)

(303): I was wondering why the cops were making such a big deal then I realized I was naked

Great Night (1231) Bad Night (83) Comment (8) More texts from (303)

(858): We sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. Jack actually started crying when I convinced him his chute didn't open.

Great Night (1222) Bad Night (47) Comment (62) More texts from (858)

(604): Is it a good thing or a bad thing when you wake up naked with two naked guys in your bed, while holding glow-in-the-dark toy dinosaurs in your hands, and listening to the lion king soundtrack?

Great Night (1203) Bad Night (200) Comment (25) More texts from (604)

(248): I just woke up with 2 girls next to me, whipped cream on my stomach, 6 used condoms in the garbage, 2 bottles of bicardi, 1 bottle of jager, and a card on my nightstand that said "Happy Birthday son! -Dad", "p.s. They're both clean and their names are Amanda and Kristen"

Great Night (1196) Bad Night (17) Comment (69) More texts from (248)

(Anonymous): Last night I received "party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its only 11. I already lost my underwear and i'm wearing a sparkly thong on my head. this has to be some kinda record." MDT

Great Night (1191) Bad Night (43) Comment (3) More texts from (Anonymous)

(Anonymous): Last night, received :"which is correct, seven and five IS thirteen, or seven and five ARE thirteen?" sent:"Neither, because it's twelve." MDT

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(716): I'm drinking with a cop telling him I don't hafta drive that far. He's telling us what to do if pulled over.

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(690): woke up in a football helmet, shoulder pads, and wrapped in a rug. great night right?

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(reddit): "No one liked my idea of calling the "(pandemic) a (hamdemic) . . . well, I'm drunks and I hope you all die in the Aporkalypse"

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Remember The Pics From Last Night?

Best Friends :)
Awesomeness!