(703): I woke up and i'm still high, wipe the sleep out from my eyes, find some weed to my surprise and a couple girls by my side, with their clothes all on the floor, hanging panties on my door thinking about the night the before like damn my hips are sore?

Great Night (198) Bad Night (14) Comment (6) More texts from (703)

(310): he told me he could read peoples minds, & everytime i walked outside he would scream "she wants my dick!" by the end of the night, we fucked 4 times. i guess he really can.

Great Night (167) Bad Night (4) Comment (3) More texts from (310)

(559): So i'm at the gym and on this machine and i realized that opening my legs is MUCH easier than closing them. Bahahah.

Great Night (158) Bad Night (13) Comment (7) More texts from (559)

(401): You shouldn't be allowed to make decisions when your drunk. You ran out in the middle of the road and stood there trying to decide if you want to finish crossing or go back. People were pissed.

Great Night (156) Bad Night (8) Comment (0) More texts from (401)

(714): you know its a good night when you go outside and find your underwear in the middle of the street. haha

Great Night (152) Bad Night (8) Comment (1) More texts from (714)

(847): Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?

Great Night (128) Bad Night (15) Comment (7) More texts from (847)

(413): I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.

Great Night (123) Bad Night (15) Comment (1) More texts from (413)

(303): its a bird... it's a plane... its my dick goin in yo mouth bitch!

Great Night (117) Bad Night (28) Comment (3) More texts from (303)

(218): I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.

Great Night (107) Bad Night (15) Comment (1) More texts from (218)

(508): right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."

Great Night (85) Bad Night (18) Comment (0) More texts from (508)

(849): so was it that crazy? (1-849) I woke up wrapped in a twister mat, with a full batman costume on. Dora the explorer was on the tv and I thought I was in mexico.

Great Night (38) Bad Night (1) Comment (0) More texts from (849)

(508): I just realized something. Otters must have ridiculous abs. I mean they can break clams on their tummies. I wish I had otter abs.

Great Night (35) Bad Night (1) Comment (1) More texts from (508)

(215): we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.

Great Night (21) Bad Night (5) Comment (0) More texts from (215)

Remember The Pics Last Night?

PARTY FOUL!!!!!! Can't let it go to waste.....
...First one to pass out gets mummifyed.
Two girls, One jello shot.
lake chelan '06 im taller after 12 keystone ices
Cheerleader on a keg!
Be a Tiger