(901): I hope they legalize pot. Cause in 20 years, I'm gonna be sitting on my porch, smoking a blunt, telling your kids about the crazy shit we used to do. It's gonna be epic.

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(901): My walk of shame this morning consisted of getting a ride home in a porche... Most epic win ever?

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(901): Since we all die eventually, does that mean everyone fails at life? (rec'vd) no, can you finish blowing me now?

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(901): dude i just say a guy that looks like the creepy dude from the Hangover

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(901): I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks

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(901): Went 2 bed wit my bf.. Woke up wit his cousin..does that make me a slut?

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(901): Did you shit in my backyard?

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(901): Hey, wht's up?

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(901): paton gave me roadhead on the late night T last weekend! fuckin hot, i was so hard and she made me cum on her nice tits too!

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(901): i was so black out drunk last night and apparantly, i fucked a girl last night because when i woke up this morning the girl in my apartment said "sorry about last night but i hope it was good" i said "why" and she said "nothing" after she left i was getting up to take a shower and saw blood EVERYWHERE she fucking had her period last night

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(901): I was sitting in this frat house and said something hilarious like "Yea I'd rather hit a bong." something that a regular person would have laughed at and they just stared at me. I was too drunk to say anything back

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(901): So he started kissing and tryig to makeout. His eyes were wide open and he was sucking faces off. It was like putting a vacum cleaner up to ur mouth..blehhhh :P

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(901): My friend is so annoying. Shes drunk high playing with umbrellas and falling off my bed..i kno tomorrow ill have a migrane...

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(901): s: hey u member at that party last night that fruit rollup u ate.....r: yeah? s: umm it wasnt a fruit rollup

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Remember The Pics From Last Night?

Best Friends :)
Awesomeness!