(757): Now slowly crawling to room. I'll text when I get to bed cuz I don't have arms. I'm a snake. Not always just right now (Sent)Oh lord. (Rec'd) SHUT UP I TOLD YOU I HAVE NO FUCKIN ARMS!

Great Night (17) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (757)

(757): (Rec'd)I'm laying in the halway cuddling a stuffed snake.(Sent)Yep. You're high.(Rec'd) It's tail jingles :) And it's so soft. I wish real snakes had fur. Then when they side their skin i can sell them as dick warners. Dude this is genius. We must breed fursnakes.Wait they make those already, they're called ferrets :( Someone beat us to it man Wait, ferrets don't shed skin. The plan is still on.

Great Night (16) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (757)

(757): They make cum flavored toothpaste. Thought you outc know that at 2:45 in the am

Great Night (11) Bad Night (2) Comment (2) More texts from (757)

(757): whatcha doin? (1-757) FUCKING GO AWAY (757) wtf man (1-757) **FUCKING. GO AWAY (757) oh ok, thats bettr :)

Great Night (28) Bad Night (2) Comment (0) More texts from (757)

(757): im bored. can i come over? (1-757) drinking hot chocolate in the shower. sooooo... yes :)

Great Night (10) Bad Night (1) Comment (0) More texts from (757)

(757): (sent) I texted Chris on prom night and said, "There are people in the bathroom beside me fucking, I wonder if i should knock like the police and scare them." (Rec'd) lol (Sent) He STILL doesn't know I was tipsy. And won't find out until I'm drunk in the Bahamas where the drinking age is 18.

Great Night (12) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (757)

(757): It's like, totally irresponsible for me to be walking the streets.

Great Night (10) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (757)

(757): Someone put alcohol in my drink and i drank a lot and now im drunk

Great Night (16) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (757)

(757): Yeah, so he basically shot any chance he had of dating me. In the head. Several times. With a bazooka. And then lit it on fire with a flamethrower.

Great Night (7) Bad Night (12) Comment (1) More texts from (757)

(757): well..i was talking to this guy..but he didnt know who snooki or the situation were...so i ditched him...who does that?!

Great Night (1) Bad Night (17) Comment (0) More texts from (757)

(757): Shots everytime someone says "the situation" or fist pumps. no way I'm getting out of this alive.

Great Night (16) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (757)

(757): Today I went to the movies with my brother, his friend, and my dad. After the movie at home I asked my dad what he thought of the movie. After listening to his analysis of the movie I realized he was just as high as we were when we saw the movie.

Great Night (23) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (757)

(757): He called my pussy the "Champagne of Pussy"

Great Night (21) Bad Night (0) Comment (0) More texts from (757)

(757): "He said he wants to make fireworks with me, I told him I'm down with the Boom Boom Pow!"

Great Night (56) Bad Night (83) Comment (1) More texts from (757)

Remember The Pics From Last Night?

Best Friends :)
Awesomeness!