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(401):
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
(314):
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
(831):
He said he wasn't ready for anything as serious as a fuck buddy, so now we're diddle buddies.
(313):
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
(316):
I'm just going to say it. If a girl will take a load to the face, she is going to cheat. That just whore 101.
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(906):
(sent)its not like i made you do anything you didnt want to do. (res) you gave me a hickie on my dick, no lie.
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12
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0
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(906)
(906):
I can now cross 'waking up under a coffee table' off my bucket list.
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14
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0
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(0)
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(906)
(906):
(3:25am) Nighthawk and i are sitting at the table watching him sway back and forth sleeping waiting to see if he falls off his chair. (3:29am) ...and we just lost him!
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16
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0
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(906)
(906):
She coughs because she has dried cum stuck in her throat from all those guys she blowed last night. Dumb whore!
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11
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15
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(3)
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(906)
(906):
i was on my way to the bathroom to take a shower, when i was in the door opened. and that person got in i saw it was my dad
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4
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17
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(0)
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(906)
(906):
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
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47
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208
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(3)
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(906)
(906):
I play hard to get. (906): Well I play to get hard.
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419
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8
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(2)
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(906)
(906):
I totally farted on him while we were dancing. I don't know it he realized it or if he liked it cause the next thing i know is his tongue was down my throat.
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10
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2
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(0)
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(906)
(906):
wheress ur yellow submarine bitch!!?!?!?!?!?
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8
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1
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(0)
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(906)
(906):
Its easy, pick out the drunkest guy. Show 'em ur tities then get ur dick.
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7
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4
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(0)
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(906)
(906):
Will you bring me some fuzzy socks and my vodka? (4:35 a.m.)
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18
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0
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(1)
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(906)
(906):
So I've slept with my boss, the bartender, 2 servers, and after the staff party the boss's boss... can I just say, Ladies are pimps too!!!
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18
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1
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(906)
(906):
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
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30
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256
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(11)
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(906)
(906):
hey im horny, your hot lets hang out. (reply) room *** now
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16
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0
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(0)
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(906)
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