(678): My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?

Great Night (69) Bad Night (318) Comment (14) More texts from (678)

(678): Went out with my ex and her husband for her 21st. Went to a strip clup and bought her a private dance. He loved it...What a loser

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(678): I think I'm sobering up, so I just may do something about that.

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(678): you were standing in my kitchen eating peanut butter and masturbatting. there are vids.

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(678): Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids

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(678): SENT:"you know what girls do in athens when it snows?" RE: "what is that" SENT: get trashed and make bad deciions.. wanna be one?" RE: "does bad deisions involve me bustin a nut?" SENT: "if your sober enough."

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(678): I Was So Wasted I Walked Up To Some Random Guy In The Bar And Got Engaged! Happy New Year!

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(678): went to taco bell, ordered 4 soft tacos. the total was 4.20 i took it as a sign and got high.

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(678): I just saw my passed out 56 yo drunken brothers naked ass! I thought I was scarred for life!... Until I found out that he showed the entire party his entire naked body while I was gone on a weed run! It hurts to think of what kind of psychotherapy my guests will need to overcome this NY eve party! rotf. ;D

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(678): Do hookers charge to snuggle??? (wtf!!! ... lol... men!)

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(678): (to a friend walking on the side of the road) Watch out for drunk drivers. Just 'cause you're a cWb (crazy white boy) dont mean theyre gonna see ur shiny ass. ;)

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(678): I was so so high that i sent "goats" to everyone in my phonebook.

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(678): I have numerous bruises & few explanations.

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(678): Ate two tubs of jello shots and kept yelling â

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Remember The Pics From Last Night?

Best Friends :)
Awesomeness!