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(604):
I don`t remember Saturday, actually (1-604): Its ok, i dont remember 2007
(978):
My boyfriend just serenaded me to tenacious d's you don't have to fuck her hard. Adorable?
(970):
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
(978):
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
(604):
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
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(720):
-Ooh sounds like a kinky night of copulation -Your vocabulary turns me on
Great Night
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(720)
(720):
i guess it is possible to drop beats while tripping.. hmm who woulda thunk
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(720)
(720):
god tripping alone sux! atleast if i was rollin i could drop a beat to some porn but this is just awkward!!
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(720)
(720):
"I just came up with my own tv show called how to snatch a child to show people how easy it is to kidnap a child in a department store." "Haha you should probably stop smoking, lol" "No hear me out on this."
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(720)
(720):
"Bring them home with you" "Dear lord I will not sleep with some young boy with the sleeves ripped off his t-shirt"
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(720)
(720):
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
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(720)
(720):
Excuse me is that a keg in ur pants cause I'd sure like to tap that ass
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(720)
(720):
you sat there for about an hour playing with Star Wars figurines. You remade the film into love story between R2-D2 and Chewie. It was quite moving
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(720)
(720):
he sings "Baby, baby, baby-- oh! I just jizzed in my pants" 651: he does NOT say that!!!
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(720)
(720):
I dont think ive seen a japanese porno haha but did almost get arrested for a striptease to anyone watching no 1 wants to see a guy do that
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(720)
(720):
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
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(720)
(720):
Theres a point where water n tequila taste the samE...i woke up this morning n hydrated myself wasted!!!
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(720)
(720):
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
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(720)
(720):
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
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(720)
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