(401): I can't stop thinking about freshman year when I got my hand stuck in the sewing machine

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(401): my stepdad asked my boyfriend if he prefers redtube or pornhub. my boyfriend said pornhub, and my stepdad nudged me, winked and went 'this one's a keeper' win or lose?

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(401): s- i love. Yu. Im fucked up. Fuckevru one im gonna ikll sojmeone r- please appear out of nowhere next time im drinking burnettes and smirnoff vodka and stop me. s-lmao please come out out no where next time imm cocked outta my mind and screaming in some random bitches face lmao.

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(401): quwane dow megwalie

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(401): Sent: so my scott walked in on my dog eating me out... Rec: omg!! Wat did he say?? Sent: should I b worried he fucked me harder then I've ever been b4 ;)

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(401): I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first

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(401): omg so i'm sitting next to these 2 girls. the wicked drunk one goes "is your dad a providence cop?" and the other said yeah. then she said "is your last name west? i think i've fucked him". LOL

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(401): She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.

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(401): Him: So you wanna go outside to your car? Her: When do you get paid? Him: Tonight... Her: How about $40 bucks? Him: How about you don't be a prostitute!? Im a christain and THAT IS WRONG!

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(401): I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..

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(401): (s): he undid my nipple rings......with his tongue! needless to say, sex = amazing!! :D (r): i cannot tell you how jealous of you i am bitch haha (s): :)

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(401): His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old

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(401): how do you say slut in sign language?

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(401): (s): we were so baked and looking for munchies. then she goes out to her car and gets a thing of chewy choc. chip cookies (r): please. Pleeeeaase tell me you had sex with her.... (s): dude, I had to.

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