(206): Think I just pooped out a human sized chewbacca in the toilet... lol it was long and big and kind of hairy lookin haha

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(206): Text message goes here...

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(206): Can you send me a picture of your boobs please? My boobs really? My boobs are hung over ha ha. No not really but he keeps asking for a picture and i CANNOT send him a picture of mine. I'll have to buy photoshop and paste a pair of those babies on my body. Thats gonna be my chore this week!

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(206): i knew the shrooms started kicking in when i reached out and touched the color violet with my soul. how come no one has ever told me that the color violet was so god damn smooth!

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(206): Soooo I woke up with the bottle of skyy next to me almost empty and the teddy bear he gave me heads was ripped off

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(206): do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"

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(206): Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.

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(206): Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.

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(206): Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.

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(206): Me: K, I'm at the bar. Joe: Ditto. My friend's girlfriend just puked ON THE BAR. Joe: WOMEN. AM I RIGHT?

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(206): lol, i left my phone in the tomatos

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(206): Why is it when you have a yeast infection it feels so good to just scratch the shit out of your vag..not good but feels so right at the time

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(206): someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.

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(206): She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.

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Remember The Pics From Last Night?

Best Friends :)
Awesomeness!