(+44): Haha omg dude earlier I chased a cow in the middle of town, watched two have sex, scored with an old man and just woke up in some trees, no idea where I am, with a blow-up doll, a used condom on my tit, bra on my forehead, a bleeding arsehole and a £20 note stuck up my vag... Oh and I could use a ride home too.
