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(715):
The cougar took me back to her place. In the morning I find out she has 2 high school age kid. The mom drove me back to campus, with the 2 kids, in a fucking minivan. (262) Did the kids say anything? (715) One of them said "So what are we going to tell dad?"
(484):
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
(319):
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
(416):
hes like the tenth guy to go down on me without me having to do anything in return. damn im good.
(804):
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
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(519):
man its not my fault. she lied and said she was 24(226) well wut is she like 28? (519) 44....
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(248):
i luv d@ gurlz from d@ gr0up "CAM" day i$ s00 d33p and th3yyyyyy g0ttt iT g00iinnn 0n!!! luvvvv demm!!!
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(248):
Randi= a classy clucking lady.
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(507):
SENT: Call me i want you baby mmm RE: hey this is brianna um thats nasty please dont talk like tat to me ok babe thanks bitch but hay call me 1320 226 9012
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(313):
when i got up this morning i slap my girl with a bag of spurm
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(814):
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
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(417):
Sent: Dude that sign kicked our ass Rcvd: No it didnt! Sent: I know we kidnapped him.
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