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(337):
are you awake? im in the park barefoot wearing a sombrero and giant t-shirt carrying a sign that says employee parking.
(480):
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
(503):
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
(267):
Dude, having sex with a pregnant chick is like the perfect business plan. No risk, all reward.
(614):
she said she'd buy me chipotle if i let her blow me... im not sure which is better. the blowjob or the burrito... or the fact that they are going to be there at the same time.
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(804):
hey man this is oober important I need some advice my man. how early is too early to slip a finger in the butt of a new girl i am dating. if the position is doggy and i slip the catchers mitt in the but (thumb in butt literally like a catchers mitt) would the first fuck be too early?
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